My mother died on August 28, 2021, and I was three days into my eighth-grade year. I was a 13-year-old girl losing her best friend. My life completely changed that day when I saw her in the ER with tubes inside her mouth. Now, it is 2026 and I feel like I lost her yesterday. Yes, days go by, one step at a time, but I feel like I am drowning in sorrow. My life is crazy and way too time consuming that I don’t let myself grieve or process. I’m a friend, a daughter, an aunt, a cousin, a granddaughter, and a niece. But I rarely make time for Miley, it is too much. A senior in high school should not have to grieve their mom. But life is not supposed to be easy. I tell myself this every single day.
On May 24, I graduate from East High School. I walked in a lost, grieving 14-year-old, and now I am walking out feeling like I am still missing a huge part of myself, starting a new chapter in my life without my mom. I don’t feel complete to cross that stage. Getting through these past four school years has been very difficult, but I made it, and I am proud of myself. And I am certain my mom would be too. It is a feeling I cannot explain, growing up without my mom. Without my rock. Without my role model. I don’t wish it on my worst enemy.
To anyone experiencing grief, reading this, or listening to my podcast “Grief talks with Miley”; you CAN do this. It will feel impossible one day. Then the other will feel like you got this. It will always feel like a rollercoaster because we are human. What has helped me get out the bed is the gym and God. This won’t help everyone but there ARE resources that can help you. Hit me up if you ever need a hug or someone to talk to.